New Meds and other Sundries

I haven’t posted in awhile. Busy with school. I’ve discovered that I like chemistry after all. I remember not liking it and not wanting to take it in high school because in junior high, we had to do A/B work if we wanted an A or a B in the class. I was so against this on principle, I wouldn’t do it and so I got C’s. I was against it because I felt that I should be graded on the basic class work and that my grade shouldn’t be based upon doing all this extra work and extra credit. Extra credit should be a choice.

Plus there was algebra, which I hated then and was not good at and, deep down, was afraid of and had convinced myself that I was no good at it. This was all because the teacher I had then was an asshole.

I conquered my math demons last year. While I had to take remedial algebra (for no credits) and then College Algebra, and I only got a C in College Algebra, I’m happy with it. I won the math battle.


Anyway, now for the meds saga. For background, see this post.  Long story short, I kept taking the prozac. I saw my doctor this past Friday and told her what happened. I’m doing better  than I was a month ago, and I know that some of it is because I started school and have more structure in my day. I’ve got my attention/focus issues sorted out and I went back on Vyvanse, which I haven’t taken in over a year. I was on that first, then switched to Concerta, which didn’t really do much for me. I wanted to get the old meds out of my system and then see how well I could manage my ADHD without meds. This was so I could get a base point. I am doing better managing some aspects of my attention and sticking to task, but I still need the meds for the other part I can’t manage.

One of the good side effects of this medication is weight loss. I have a confession to make. When I went off the ADHD meds, I gained at least 50 pounds. I’m flirting with weighing 200 lbs and I’m not liking this. It’s harder to find clothes that look nice and fit. I don’t like being winded. On the flip side, I do like the fact that my boobs are HUGE now.  As much as I try and get up and move, I haven’t been able to lose the weight or maintain where I’m at. I know some of this is due to age.

I will probably lose a bunch of weight after I’m on the meds for a bit. I’m hoping that I don’t lose too much in the beginning because I bought a dress for my son’s wedding and it would suck if it were too big for me to wear. Best case scenario is that I won’t have to wear the spanx I bought to wear with it. I do have a back-up dress. I’m hoping I don’t need it. It’s a nice dress, but it’s black and I don’t want to wear a black dress to my son’s wedding. I genuinely like my future daughter-in-law and I do not want people to think I’m pulling some attention whoring stunt by wearing a black dress.  Even so, if it comes to it, I’ll let her know what’s going on and why.

Right now, I swear, I could go run laps around the apartment complex and still not calm down.

I haven’t done a song of the day in awhile, so I’ll do one.

Today is opening day for the NFL and the Packers-Bears game is being nationally televised.  The Packers are in Chicago, so when they score, we won’t be hearing any Bang on the Drum. Today’s song is Bang on the Drum. I plan on firing this up whenever Green Bay scores.



My Head is Swimming

Well, I can definitely tell that things are getting better as far as the sinus infection is concerned. I can get up and do things, but when my head starts to swim, I have to sit down. I’m hoping to make soup tonight.

Less than 7 days until school starts back up again. I’m looking forward to it. This morning, my chemistry class was posted on D2L, and I can tell it’s going to be a tough one. I’m up for the challenge.

I’m waiting on a couple of text books to come today. These are for my two psych classes.

Two Days Ago, it was in the 90s and humid. What a difference two days and a cold front makes.

It’s gray and cool for August. Soup weather. In fact, if my head stops swimming, I’m going to make soup for supper.  This is one of those days that remind me of October and that when fall rolls around, I like to start baking and cooking again, especially comfort food.

There’s a glitch in my new meds. I can’t afford them. So now, between the doctor, the pharmacy and me, we have to figure out something that works and something I can afford. $75 a month is ridiculous.

This is one issue that many people who deal with a mental illness face: little access to affordable medications. The insurance companies don’t seem to understand that psych meds work differently on different people. What works for me may not work for someone else. Because two medications are similar doesn’t mean that they work the same on different people, either.

Sometimes, a medication works for awhile, but then it isn’t as effective after a period of time. This is what is happening to me at the moment. I need to try something else, but again, my insurance company is interfering with the decision that should be between and my doctor.  When the option we decide on for my disease management is either denied to me outright or it becomes difficult for me to have access to it, I am basically in the position where someone in an office, some number cruncher, is dictating my health care to me.

Ironically, this was something that people who opposed the Affordable Care Act cited: bureaucrats and strangers making medical decisions for you. This has been going on long before Obamacare became the law. This is also not the first time I’ve had this happen to me, either.

When people do not have access to medications, counseling, or whatever treatments they need to have, treatments that are decided upon by both patient and doctor, mental illness goes untreated.

Untreated mental illness does not get better on its own. 

People need treatment now, not later. Not when they become agoraphobic from an untreated anxiety disorder. Not when they start listening to the voices telling them to do things they know they shouldn’t do because they have undiagnosed or untreated schizophrenia.

They need it NOW. 



Today’s song is Here Comes That Rainy Day Feeling Again by the Fortunes. It’s a rather upbeat song about something sad. It’s a good metaphor for today. I’m feeling upbeat, but the day is gloomy.


Psychology, Behavior and Citing Aaron Rodgers in my Paper

First semester of college is pretty much in the books (as I type, I still have one more final presentation to do and my semester is done.), which means that for now, I have some time to actually write on this blog.

In my English 101 class, we learned how to write academic-style papers. Apparently, this is not being taught in high school. Also apparently, (and much to my joy) footnotes are no longer used. If you’re old enough to have had to type papers on a typewriter (because the teacher would not accept said paper in “dot matrix”) and have struggled with the proper placement of the superscript via typewriter, you will understand what I mean.

We had a “big” paper, which was a research-based argument, using at least two academic journals as sources and in either MLA or APA format. We could pick the topic.  I chose the topic of sports’ fans behavior, mostly because the Packers had just lost.


If you follow me on Twitter, I’ve mentioned this paper and the research a few times. The research is fascinating. Psychologists have studied the behavior of sports fans for decades, so there was a lot of information out there.

So, in light of the Packers losing yesterday, and the reaction by some people to this loss, I decided to post my paper. It’s in PDF (mostly because I wanted to watermark it. Not that it’s going to stop someone who really wants to plagiarize me from doing so, but at least I tried to discourage it.)

All things psychology fascinate me. That’s a good thing, being a psychology major and all.

Fans Behaving Badly: The Psychology of Sports Team Identification, Group Dynamics and Self-Esteem

Please remember, this is an academic-style paper written for a college class which contains information based upon decades of scientific research published in academic journals. This is not my opinion nor am I telling people how they should or shouldn’t act.  It’s information. What you do with it and how you interpret it is your business.

Again, because much has been made about some of the more vitriolic reactions to the Packers’ performance against Buffalo, and people asking why someone would react the way they do, is why I decided to post my paper.

This behavior is not exclusive to sports’ fans. I’ve witnessed it in non-sports areas, too. The “highly attached fan” exists in fan communities for TV shows, books, movies, anime, video games and pretty much anything that has a fan base.

Again, this is not condemnation. It’s human nature.  I’ve witnessed so-called “nerds” bash sports fans for doing the very thing that they do to celebrate their fandom (and get bashed for it by the jocks).

Plus I got to cite, in proper MLA format, of course, “Tuesdays with Aaron” as a source. How many people can say they’ve done that? 🙂